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Dexter Colston landed in the foster care system when he was about 13 after his mother rejected him because he is gay.He bounced through a couple dozen foster care facilities where adults couldn't relate to him and other children could be brutal.''I ended up getting my front teeth knocked out,'' Colston recalled about one group home."I just didn't feel safe. Me and the other gay kids in the house carried knives.''By the time Colston found Tom Herfort, a gay foster parent in Fort Lauderdale, he was a 17-year-old dropout addicted to drugs. He credits Herfort with turning his life around and taking him to Narcotics Anonymous."It's the best relationship I've had with anyone. I couldn't ask for better,'' said Colston, now 19 and living on his own in Orlando."It was definitely a blessing having him become my parent.''Many gay foster teenagers never find a good home.Recognizing the gap in service, Broward's foster care agency, ChildNet, has contracted with the National Youth Advocate Program (NYAP) to recruit and train foster parents to take in gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender foster children.''A lot of kids go through an awful lot because of gender identity questions and issues and their needs don't get met in the absence of people who have had experience with those issues,'' said Larry Rein, interim president of ChildNet, which serves about 2,500 children, including about 600 in foster homes.Although Florida bans gay adults from adopting, the state does allow them to take in foster children. Providing foster care services since 1978, NYAP also will find homes for foster children with moderate medical needs or with substance abuse problems.Lila Cavasos, director of contract services and licensing for ChildNet, said foster care agencies in Broward often can't find placements for those children.The ChildNet contract is NYAP's first that specifically includes finding parents-gay or straight-to take in gay children.''It has to be someone who can accept all kinds of differences in kids,'' said Chris Kirk, who oversees placements for NYAP.Gay foster teenagers may struggle in school and suffer from depression and drug abuse. NYAP is eager to succeed, but it won't be easy, Cavasos said.''It's going to be very very hard for them to do,'' Cavasos said."There are not a lot of people in Broward County who are going to have the time and patience to work with these children.''ChildNet will pay NYAP about $35,000 in startup costs, plus $85 to $135 for each child it places, some of which goes to the foster parents.During the past five years, gay rights and child welfare groups have researched the experience of gay foster youth. What they found was horrific.'Adults would say, "If you weren't gay, you wouldn't get beat up,' '' said Flor Bermudez, an attorney for Lambda Legal in New York."Or they would be placed in very religious foster homes where foster parents would take away their clothes . . . and have them go to church every Sunday so they would change.''Sometimes social workers know a child is gay but don't tell the foster family, said Rob Woronoff, a consultant and former GLBT director of the Child Welfare League of America.'A kid . . . comes out, and the foster parents say, `Nobody told us this kid was gay,' '' he said.Herfort, a gay Fort Lauderdale resident, became a foster parent after hearing SunServe, a gay social services agency, speak about the need at Sunshine Cathedral church. He took in two gay teenagers last year, including Colston.One boy had too many problems and eventually was placed elsewhere. But the match between Colston and Herfort was a success.''For Father's Day, he sent me a card,'' Herfort said. "He said it was the first time he had the chance to send a Father's Day present.''Herfort said the needs of gay foster children and the skills to parent them aren't that different.''They are all lovable. They are all someone's child,'' he said."They need a place where they can call home.''
PS:Gays fostering other gays kids.....!!!!(sigh) Sometimes I think I heard it all....We are witnessing the END TIMES....
As in the days of Noah....
